Steven Wade is a family law advisor (McKenzie Friend) with nearly 20 years of experience helping people represent themselves in court. Having been through the system personally and supported thousands of others since, he knows what it’s like to face the stress, confusion, and pressure of doing it alone. This blog shares practical insights that empower you to take control of your case — without the legal jargon or the hefty solicitor’s bill.
Top Ten Tips On Working on Your Family Law Case
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The only alternative to a solicitor.
Keeping Focus on Preparing Documents For Family Court
Preparing documents for Court is just as stressful as going to Court. But take heart, this can be managed. If you can look after your wellbeing and take filling in those long forms at a healthy pace, you will complete the task. This is not an examination and a test of your character. It is just work that needs to be done. These are our Top Ten Tips On Working on Your Family Law Case
By the end of this article you should be able to
- Be prepared to go through your court documents by staying task focussed
- Recognise that keeping the process small with win the race quicker than piling on the pressure to devour all the documents at once
- Recognise when either the workload or your close emotional involved in the material are overwhelming you
- Know how to physically support yourself through this overwhelming task
Working from Home On Your Own Case
This year working from home has become a new reality for most. Before, Working From Home was the mythical dream seemingly reserved for absentee managers and consultants not very keen on commuting. Following Government guidelines to restrict the spread of COVID-19, working from home became the safe instruction to keep outselves and our families safe.
Suddenly Working From Home has become a reality for some careers which wuld not considered as part of this model in the pre-Coronavirus days. Teachers were teaching online from home, and even GP’s were adapting this diagnosis methods to endure that they could contine to see patients without being in the Surgery.
Working on a Family Law Case is complex.
1. Have a dedicated Workspace.
A chair you can sit in comforably, and elbows perpendicular to the keyboard. Anyone who has had to complete a Health & Safety at Work Induction morning at a new job will know this. This advice is not simply to take up a morning for an employer to tick boxes for your induction, there is often some helpful guidance contained within these sessions.
This also allow you to demark this time as ‘Case Working Time’ and dedicate the time only to this task. Set a timer for 20 minute intervals so the whole workload does not seem overwhelming.
2. Get dressed for Business!
COVID-19 has made us all rather lazy in this respect. Putting on ‘outside clothes’ puts a demarkation on the start of your day. Also, you need to be ready if you have an improptu Zoom Meeting with a source of support on your case.
3. Have a To-Do list.
Better still, have your list created in Google Tasks so you can benefit from the satisfaction of marking even the tiniest task or action as ‘Complete’ (Including tasks like ‘Put Ink Cartridges in Printer’) This will fire up little reward dopamine bursts in your brain. If you are more old school and still prefer Paper Wallcharts, get some coloured stickers and stars. Studies have found that this approach is as successful with adults as it is with children.
4. Ignore Domestic Chores while you are working on Case Time.
This is your work and study time and must be dedicated to this. The urge to vacuum the entire home will only serve as a distraction
5. Likewise, put your mobile phone into ‘Airplane’ Mode.
Managing home distractions is as important as managing similar distractions if you were in the office working. At times of stress when having to recall times and dates, I would go as far as to turn off the radio and TV. More can be done in 20 focussed minutes than 3 days peppered with distraction. This method of working is deployed in The Pomodoro Technique, – a productivity favoured by Academics Worldwide.
6. Keep In Contact With Other People.
Connect on Social Media and feel free to discussion topics. Adding yourself to groups such as Family Law Assistance on Facebook will give you a share to see our up to date advice and the feedback we recieved from other parents in similar positions. Be careful of Social Media groups which attract negative and the indepth feelings from others who are coping with pain and resentment. Your case needs your energy. Details of other heartbreaking cases with shift your focus from dealing with the basics of your case
7. Take Breaks.
Set an alarm to make a cup of tea, and give your eyes a computer rest every hour.
8. Remind Others in your Household That You Are Concentrating On Something Important.
Put a ‘Working – Do Not Disturb’ sign. Make this a boundary, and stick to it. You are entitled to dedicated time with no interuptions for something so important
9. When Reading and Writing Finishes for the day. Stop.
Make a definitive start and stop time to your documentation work plan. For example, No work between the hours of 9pm and 6am. You will not solve any major issues by worrying about it, or working on it with a scattergun approach at 3am.
10. Visualise the outcome so you know what you are asking for from this experience of dealing with Family Court. .
Do you want more overnight visits? Would you attempt mediation again with the other parent of your children? What time do you need to make Visitation have value and good use. What can be factored into your Court Hearing to safeguard against further disruption and disturbance to their formative years? The deeper you think without the grinding worry, the most likely the ideas you have with provide a clear way forward for you as a parent.
You will get there eventually!
This time in the lead up to your case will not last forever, and you can use this time wisely. There is huge scope to use this dedicated time to examine all the special qualities that you bring to being a parent. So be kind to yourself and stay focussed.
Follow these Ten Tips On Working on Your Family Law Case, and you are already on a path to improve everyone’s life for the better. It just feels difficult right now, but time always does move forward.
This post is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice.
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About the author…
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