Steven Wade is a family law advisor (McKenzie Friend) with nearly 20 years of experience helping people represent themselves in court. Having been through the system personally and supported thousands of others since, he knows what it’s like to face the stress, confusion, and pressure of doing it alone. This blog shares practical insights that empower you to take control of your case — without the legal jargon or the hefty solicitor’s bill.
What happens if my ex doesn’t turn up?
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What happens if my ex doesn’t turn up to the Family Court?
It happens, depressingly too often. You’ve done all the paperwork, psyched yourself up, paid for a solicitor or us to assist you, taken the day off work and you’re at the court building. You’re about to find out the answer to the question `What happens if my ex doesn’t turn up to the Family Court?’
The answer is…it depends. It depends on the judge or the magistrates. It depends on what has happened in previous hearings. Or something else.
So what happens then?
Well…there is nothing to stop a court making an order in the absence of the party that has decided to `give it a miss’. Don’t show and you’re effectively saying `You make the order without me – I’m happy to go along with whatever you decide’. Although I think we all know that’s what people are actually doing.
So the court can make an order you absolutely hate. That’s the first thing that can happen.
Why do people `no show’?
Of course, it’s quite possible a non-attendee is doing so because they are extremely anxious about the prospect of going to court. Or wants to drag it out. Or has contempt for the court (which is an offence you can get punished to happen). Or say they have another commitment which stops them attending (good reasons are extremely rare – something along the lines of your being in hospital).
The second more likely scenario is that the court…will do nothing. I’ve been to too many hearings where a judge or magistrate will sadly shake their head, say how cross they are and then adjourn the hearing to a later day saying `I can’t make an order in the absence of him/her’. This is rubbish of course – what they really mean is they won’t.
It’s worth mentioning that if this is a repeat performance that a court will make an order – so not turning up is playing with fire.
If this is the child hearing you may wish to point out that delay isn’t in the best interests of your child but the court may decide it’s more important to have a hearing where it here’s everyone’s point of view.
You can but try.
What happens if my ex doesn’t turn up to the Family Court: What can I do?
The answer is – `Not a lot’. The court gets to make the decisions and it’ll probably do nothing.
Don’t be too dismayed though – if you’re the one who turned up and your ex didn’t, it’s worth pointing out they’re not acting in a child-focused manner (if it’s a child case) and they’ve introduced avoidable delay as well as showing disrespect for the court. This probably won’t make a huge difference, but sadly that’s as likely as good as it’s going to get.
This post is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice.
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