Trial By Social Media

Steven Wadehttps://familylawassistance.co.uk/our-founders/

What do we mean by Social Media?

Well, since the start of the COVID-19 Pandemic, literally all aspects of our lives. For many, this is the only 4-dimensional contact we have with our friends and family. Our Work Colleagues. Our children. For separated families, sites like Facebook, Instagram and Twitter have become the cohesive glue to hold our fragile like social structures together, in a skeletal way. But do not let your Family Law Case become Trial By Social Media.

Online Life V ‘Real Life’

But what happens if this very powerful medium falls into the hands of someone you are in conflict with in ‘Real Life’? Well, guess what. Social Media now is very much real life. And like Real life, it has the same pitfalls and hurdles to negotiate.

Facebook is referenced often in Family Court

Those late-night knee-jerk reactions to photographs that are intended by the Original Poster to trigger a response from us, can be submitted into Court Bundle and reference in Hearings. In short, used as evidence. So be careful with those throwaway comments like “Ooh. You’re big and clever now with your flash new sunglasses, but our Son needs shoes” could come back to haunt in the pettiest way imageable. Petty attracts Petty, and no-one wants to be stuck in a loop of childish responses. Not even children. Especially not children, and the ones you have a responsibility to prevent the normalisation of this sort of exchange.

A Good Rule Of Under The Thumb

Whilst we are still in the infancy of how much Social Media is a part of our social standing, there is little in the way of solid laws concerning misuse of Social Media. But this is being taken seriously, and it is a matter of time before sand starts to shift. Today’s sarcastic comment is tomorrows Hate Crime or evidence of coercive abuse allegation.

A good rule of thumb is do not put anything on Social Media that would not say to someone in the flesh. If something is so insulting that, in the flesh it would earn more than a dirty look as a response – do not post it.

Sit on your hands. Save as draft

The same goes for emails. If in 24 hours you still feel the need to post – go ahead. The chances are you would be in a better frame of minds with less adrenaline coursing through your system. Those using this method of managing their posting behaviour very rarely feel the same in 24 hours. Let Time be the great healer for those injured feelings.

Prove It!

On the subject of evidence. If you are involved in a case where unfounded allegations about partying are being flung around the Court room to the beat of ‘Uptown Funk”, it is probably best not to post photos of Yourself “and the gang having top bants” – just until the Order is written up. Facebook is a Photo Gallery to the depths of you should and it is surprising how one innocent photo of having alcohol with your meal in a restaurant will be weaponised by someone with an agenda of standing up a complained to the court about your socialising.

Court makes Foe petty. Facebook makes Foe petty. Together it is a lethal combination for any fairness you need for your Family Law case. So, manage it wisely.

In conclusion

Have fun with Social Media. It is supposed to be fun and hugely positive! For all the chats and videoconference to connect with socially-distanced friends – around the World very often. However, treat it properly. In old money, if anyone behaved poorly in a social setting they would be barred. Would the message if yelled across a Pub have you barred or judged badly? Yes? Well, reconsider. And Remember to still have fun and do not let your case become a Personality Trial By Social Media.

About the author…

Steven Wadehttps://familylawassistance.co.uk/our-founders/

Steven Wade is the founder of Family Law Assistance, a team of McKenzie Friends supporting litigants in person through the family court system in England and Wales. With nearly two decades of experience in family law starting in 2006., Steven has guided hundreds of clients through proceedings involving child arrangements, parental alienation, financial disputes, and non-molestation orders as well as finance and divorce matters. He's run branches of Fathers Need Fathers in England and Wales (now Both Parents Matter), hosted workshops for separated parents, trained McKenzie Friends to assist litigants in the family and travels around the country to assist men and women in and out of court. Steven regularly produces content to demystify legal processes both in blog posts on this site and also on Tiktok and is known for his empathetic, practical advice. He has delivered training and support to parents and support workers dealing with the route through the family court.