Steven Wade is a family law advisor (McKenzie Friend) with nearly 20 years of experience helping people represent themselves in court. Having been through the system personally and supported thousands of others since, he knows what it’s like to face the stress, confusion, and pressure of doing it alone. This blog shares practical insights that empower you to take control of your case — without the legal jargon or the hefty solicitor’s bill.
What do I do if my ex husband is delaying financial settlement?
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What do I do if my ex husband is delaying financial settlement?
- Introduction
- What happens if you DO agree a financial settlement with your ex?
- What happens if you don’t agree a financial settlement with your ex (the application)
- What happens if you don’t agree a financial settlement with your ex (the FHDRA)
- What happens if you don’t agree a financial settlement with your ex (the FDR)
- What happens if you don’t agree a financial settlement with your ex (the Final Hearing)
- Conclusion
- FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions)
Introduction
Of the three `main’ strands of family law – divorce, children and finance – finance is often the most expensive, thorniest and drawn out one.
It’s important to point out at the very start that a financial settlement for a divorcing couple is covered by the Matrimonial Causes Act 1973 and not unmarried couples (they can sometimes use a different area of law, but it’s often less certain and more tricky).
There is a simple reason for this: People’s financial lives can be very complicated and courts will want to tie up every loose end for a divorcing couple to severe all links and prevent there being trouble down the line.
But for all the complexity of case, often the biggest determining factor when it comes to time and money to get a final order is how agreeable or disagreeable one or both parties involved is in coming to a settlement.
When people agree, the process is simple. It can be achieved with a simple form, a low fee and a joint draft order sent to the court which is rubber stamped and returned.
When they don’t….well. Expect large amounts of correspondence, large amounts of paperwork with huge trial bundles, hostile questioning, painful cross examination and high legal costs that swallow up chunks of the assets people are arguing over in the first place.
Having said that you may well find yourself in a position where you’re best (and only option) is to ask the court for assistance!
For this reason an agreed settlement is almost always the best option – if both parties are being reasonable.
What happens if you DO agree a financial settlement with your ex?
Agreeing a settlement with your ex spouse is `best case scenario‘ stuff!
You’re going to save time, money, heartbreak and have a lot more certainty and control over the whole process – because the moment a court application is made all bets are off and you’re leaving it to a total stranger (i.e. a judge) to make a decision that neither of you may like.
The process is very simple if you agree things with your ex partner.
You’ll need to complete a form (it’s called a Form A) and sent it off with a draft order signed by you and your ex, and the fee (£53 in September 2023) with a D81 form.
The draft order will detail all assets and liabilities, what is happening to the house (if there is one), who is responsible for getting it all sorted and a timescale for it to happen. Assuming the court is happy with the statement and has no questions about it (i.e. you haven’t missed off anything important, it seems fair and is consistent with the law) you’ll get a `sealed’ (stamped) order back that makes it legal.
That’s it.
If here because you’re asking `my ex husband is delaying financial settlement’ though….the process is little more complicated.
What happens if you don’t agree a financial settlement with your ex (the application)
This is where it gets tricky, as well as possibly expensive, drawn out and challenging.
The process starts in the same way as if you do agree – you send the Form A off, but with a fee of £275 (in September 2023). Mediation needs to attempted where appropriate beforehand.
You’ll receive a response from the court with an order with a large `to do’ list. This includes:
- When the FHDRA (a `First Hearing Dispute Resolution Appointment’) is.
- A timetable that specifies when parties need to submit certain forms, documents, and questionnaires.
- Supporting documents.
- A chronology.
You’ll need to submit these documents in time to the court (and your ex’s solicitor) because if you fail to do so it can hold things up and/or damage your case.
What happens if you don’t agree a financial settlement with your ex (the FHDRA)
At the FHDRA the court will engage in `housekeeping’ (i.e. checking it has all the information it needs to make a fair decision and to see if both parties can come to an agreement without taking things further). It may also set out a further timetable for parties to submit additional information. This can include:
- Witness statements.
- Reports.
- Valuations.
- Further questionnaires.
- Correspondence.
- Other relevant documents.
The applicant’s solicitor prepares the trial bundle if they have one. If the applicant doesn’t have a solicitor, the respondent’s solicitor prepares it. If neither party has representation, the applicant prepares the trial bundle.
It’s worth pointing out that it’s far from uncommon for their to be `misunderstandings’ when it comes to putting a bundle together. The court will only look at documents in it so if you have something important it needs to be see it has to be in there. Typically you’ll send the documents you wish to include to the party putting the bundle together who will include it.
But the problem is that it is far from unknown for that killer document you need to go in.
Solicitors often omit documents due to `admin errors’, deciding they’re not relevant to the case, or simply ignoring them. If that happens you may find yourself asking the court if it’ll accept your documents at the hearing with the court and/or the other party’s solicitor saying they should not be considered in your hearing.
It’s possible for the trial bundle to be added to at every hearing. At every stage negotiation, discussion and settlement is encouraged and at any point agreement can be made.
At the FHDRA, the court will decide what the next steps are. This will include further information, timetables, questionnaires and a subsequent hearing – a DRA
What happens if you don’t agree a financial settlement with your ex (the FDR)
The Financial Dispute Resolution (or FDR) appointment is the next hearing to take place. Again, at this hearing it is possible for both parties to come to an agreement the court that can end the case there and then.
The court strongly encourages both parties to come to an agreement here. It will save further expense and time as well as provide an order made by consent. That’s far better than having an order you hate imposed on you. These hearings take place `without prejudice’ (meaning anything said at this hearing cannot be referred to down the line) without your ex attempting to use them against you For the same reason the judge who is at the FDR will not be permitted to attend any subsequent hearings.
At this hearing both parties will set out their case. The judge will indicate how they think things will go if a final hearing takes place. The court will not be at a position to decide the truth of the position of either party. The indication does not mean something will be ordered at a final hearing. Tt’s your gamble to decide if you think it is better to come to an agreement at this stage or else let the court to make a final decision. However, the court might decide you should pay your ex’s legal costs if it finds you are being unreasonable.
If the court schedules a final hearing, it will issue directions to prepare for it. This will include any final additional documentation that needs to go into the bundle, further timetables to make that happen and any other statements the court requires to enable it to make a final decision.
What happens if you don’t agree a financial settlement with your ex (the Final Hearing)
Final hearings can take several days depending on the complexity of the case or if the parties disagree substantially.
There may be a pre-trial review hearing to do further `house keeping’ in preparation for the final hearing.
At the day of the final hearing the following will take place:
- Parties will arrive an hour before the hearing to discuss the case. This is to see if they can come to an agreement.
- The court will ensure it has everything it needs to ensure the hearing is effective.</li>
- They will read `opening submissions’ – saying how they see the case and what should happen; usually the applicant goes
- first.
- The bulk of the hearing then takes place – cross examination. Each party, their barrister, or even the judge will question the other to provide evidence. Both parties will also cross-examine any witnesses.
- Finally, it’s `closing submissions’. It’s a final opportunity for both parties to put their cases forward and any final arguments.
After all this the judge will retire and make a decision. The judge will either make this decision orally on the day. Otherwise, the court will send it out a few days later, and you’ll receive a final order – a Financial Remedies Order.
The decision will tie up all lose ends – everything. What happens to assets and liabilities. When things have to happen. Whether the court orders one party to pay the other party’s costs or not.
These hearings can be bruising, upsetting, expensive and stressful. It’s why it’s best to try to avoid them.
Conclusion
There is night and day between agreeing a settlement and not doing so.
It’s why you’re not going to get a clear answer if you ask `How much is my financial settlement going to cost?’ There are so many variables and the capacity for people to make things awkward is high. Litigants (and their solicitor/barrister) can omit or be selective with evidence, engage in foot-dragging tactics, be unreasonable, act irrationally, act without a legal basis and more.
And as the paperwork increases, it becomes progressively more complicated, time-consuming, and challenging to keep track of everything. Throw in the prospect you may end up paying your ex’s legal costs (on top of your own) the stakes only grow and you face the prospect of walking away with little, nothing or even in debt.
For this reason it’s important to seek an agreement where ever possible, as hard is it may be. An agreement means you have more control over the outcome than if a court imposes one – you have a better chance of achieving at least some of what you want.
It’s possible to find this agreement in a variety of ways too – via mediation, via `round the table’ meetings and at every stage of proceedings to avoid a Final Hearing.
Wherever possible you should seek agreement. Because it will cost far less and it will also be far less painful.
I hope this blog post helps. `My ex husband is delaying financial settlement’ is something people tell me too many times. Hence this post!
After 2 decades of doing this, we’re pretty good at this side of things. To have us by your side to do this, book an Ask Me Anything online session. We’ll be with you from the start.
This post is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice.
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